It's a feeling I've experienced a few times before: around graduation from university, in the lead-up to leaving Ireland... the feeling that I was leaving something behind that I'd never quite replace. It's something I feel right now; that I'll never quite have a work crew like the crew I have now. I know there will be times when I truly miss how personal this job I've done for the last 12 years has been, the feeling I've shared with others of having built something nearly brilliant from the bottom up.

I think a large part of me also held this job, this company, as the foundation I built my Canadian life upon. Indeed, it will always be that. It's really something when you receive those meaningful welcomes as an immigrant. Not just the verbal welcomes, though they count too. But the "I'm willing to rent you an apartment" or "I'm willing to give you a job." And though you may think it can't be too hard for a white Western European, it really was (which makes me very cognizant of how much harder it is for less privileged immigrants and refugees).

But just as it was after graduation and after leaving Ireland, it's also time to build something new. I know this in my bones and it's probably been the case for longer than I've cared to acknowledge it. But that doesn't make it easy. It doesn't mean no tears have been shed. And I probably won't confidently come out the other side for a while yet. But, at the same time, I'm up for all of it.

Plus, it's almost Christmas too, and so it's okay to hang out in the half-light, wondering what will come with the morrow.

Some Friday links:
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