Sunday's usually a day of deliberate relaxation. I do all those things that ought to be relaxing, hanging out in coffee shops, watching movies, reading books. I do chores too, because when they're left undone, they nag at me. And yet, Sunday nights are always fretful. Monday looms and crawls under my skin. I never sleep on Sunday nights.
But I'm off all next week, so I can do all those normal Sunday things and they'll take on a different hue. It won't be me trying to relax myself, it will be me (I hope) actually beginning to relax.
I haven't been sleeping well for a few weeks. Work has been inundating. But more than that, I'm stuck in a few different loops. I need to persuade myself to give up the ghost on some things. I've even told people that I've already done so. But I've been clinging on at the back of my mind and that's making me frustrated with myself.
To be honest, I've been feeling suddenly old and second-guessing some pretty big things in my past. It's not like me to look back. I guess I feel like I'm getting too old to believe things will turn out better next time. I need to settle my mind this week. I see these loops for what they are, but they have a gravitational pull all of their own.
It's a good time to reread my favourite Austen novel, Persuasion. Anne Elliott is always endearing and relatable to me and it's a gentle, reassuring read for my present mood.
Have a lovely Sunday!
Products: Fine wool pullover from Toast | Ines scarf from A Peace Treaty | Current/Elliott The Roller jeans from Net-a-Porter | Flat Shopper from M0851 | Arrow ring from Odette | Austen collection from Abebooks | Minnetonka Kilty from Gravity Pope