I've been travelling the byways and highways for the last week. There have been moments of deep inhalations, with tears in my eyes at the beauty of it all, flashes of vexation at a country whose habits I've grown unused to and now find myself disliking and moments of complete understanding.
Something about returning to this all-too-familiar context helps me understand myself better. I've used the word "arbitrary" to describe how I sometimes feel in Toronto. There's no deep reason for me being there, no connection or love of my life binding me to that place. But, through being here, back in Ireland where I have all those connections and binds, I've come to understand a simple fact: I love my life in Toronto.
Maybe that's enough reason to be there. And looking for something external and objectively verifiable, constant through the vagaries of my moods and mini-crises is a pyrrhic kind of battle to fight with oneself. And so I'll leave you with that. I have another week here and I intend to drink deep from the cup, go slower than I did my first week. Wallow in the things here that soothe.
Have an amazing weekend!
Photo, my own. More here.